I didn’t realise how many political orators we had in this our country until last week’s election happened. It was as if a zillion light bulbs suddenly went off in every brain. Suddenly everyone has something ‘intelligent’ to say about our politics.
Take a quick look at people’s social media timelines and you will see that what I’m saying is true. Never mind that some of these ‘intelligent’ comments and rants are a little misplaced. Take for instance this man who in a fury of holy political anger said, “In protest, I will not take my children back to school, then we will see who will partake of their
so called free education. As for me and my household, we shall remain illiterate until there is change of government.” On February18, Voting day, hash tags UgandaDecides, UgandaElections and MuseveniDecides were trending both on Facebook and Twitter but just one day later, they were nowhere to be seen on the list of trending topics.
Yet still you wonder why change never comes. One day we are on fire, next day we are reclining on our worn out couches sipping on warm beer throwing insults at invisible political enemies waiting for the next election so we can tweet #UgandaDecides. I hate to sound like a certain kindergarten headmistress, who with her fossil weave insists that your little four-year-old munchkin must only watch 7pm news in Luganda not cartoons but it looks like I must. You see, to be an orator or expert, you must attain some kind of education in the cause that you so fervently purport to fight for.
At least educate yourself on different things such as the party and life of the candidate you claim to support, the workings of African democracies and elections. Also kindly spell your “big” words right and use them correctly. And, if you are celebrating your victory of elections, how about you tuck in those extra pounds of flesh in a well-fitting Tshirt so that when you start ululating and jumping up and down in victory dance, you do not instead end up traumatising us with an immoral show of fat. Lastly, if you are going to rant, protest, celebrate, and issue press conferences, do it right. Stop ‘killing’ us with ignorant, badly spelt social media posts. If you cannot write or are not sure of your facts, use emojis.
Janet Napio is our guest writer. Stella Riunga will be back
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